Month: June 2023

  • Being a carer of a stroke sufferer

    Being a carer of a stroke sufferer

    My wife has a complex medical history, including open heart surgeries, a major stroke, and the recent discovery of a large growth at the base of her skull. We are currently monitoring the growth to understand its implications.

    Strokes are intricate and can have varying impacts on individuals. In fortunate cases, the effects are minimal, and individuals can recover up to 100%. However, in other cases, the challenges can be substantial. My wife has experienced significant losses, such as blindness in both eyes on the right side, coordination issues, difficulties with forward-thinking, hearing difficulties in crowded environments, struggles with complex conversations, and persistent fatigue.

    Being a partner and caregiver for someone who has had a stroke is an incredibly demanding role. It requires daily exploration and understanding of who they are now, what they have lost, how they process information, their capabilities, and their limitations.

    It feels like an ongoing process of grieving. Acceptance becomes elusive because every day, week, or month brings new changes and challenges. As a caregiver, I have taken on not only my previous responsibilities but also assumed the majority of family responsibilities, including raising teenagers. It is a heart-wrenching and soul-crushing experience.

    Unfortunately, there is no preparation or guidance for such a journey, and our Western culture often lacks adequate support systems for caregivers and their loved ones facing these difficulties.

  • From Trailer trash to dreams of a Better Life

    From Trailer trash to dreams of a Better Life

    Life has a funny way of weaving intricate stories, and mine is no exception. I am a complex individual, wearing multiple hats as a husband, father to three adult boys, and a caregiver for my wife who battles complex health conditions. Let me take you on a journey through some chapters of my history, filled with twists and turns that have shaped who I am today.

    Born in New Zealand, my early life took me across the seas at a mere nine months old. My father, a US Marine, and my mother, who was on a Christian Science scholarship, met during her time at Principia in St. Louis, Missouri. Family ties were formed, but secrets lingered within my father’s past. Being adopted, he faced the challenge of tracing his roots, with little information to guide him. It seems his adoptive parents conceived a child of their own shortly after adopting him, which may explain the scarcity of clues in DNA searches—a testament to his cult’s beliefs regarding blood and transfusions.

    Growing up, my family’s journey was marked by uncertainty and the struggle to find stability. We lived in a trailer park, and my father had difficulty holding down a steady job. He tried his hand at various ventures, from a food truck to selling insurance, but success eluded him. When I was around four years old, my mother, brother, and I made the decision to immigrate to Australia, where much of my mother’s family had already settled.

    Our Australian adventure brought its own set of challenges. I attended three different primary schools within four years, as my mother did her best to provide us with stability amidst the transitions. Academically, I faced my own struggles. Reading was not my forte, and I was labeled as “special needs,” leading to the decision to repeat year four. However, music and technical skills were my strengths. I found solace in playing the bass and guitar, participating in every school production, even receiving a school service award for the district.

    At the age of eleven, my mother remarried, and our family relocated to a coal town in central Queensland. It was here that I spent my formative years, surrounded by the rugged beauty of the countryside. Farms, wide-open spaces, and school became my everyday reality. While I excelled in technical and musical pursuits, my academic performance left much to be desired. I yearned for something beyond the confines of small-town life.

    Dreams of escape led me to consider a career as an airline steward. However, the narrow-minded views of my parents, influenced by the white, rural, and possibly homophobic mindset prevalent in the mining community, greeted my aspirations with negativity. Undeterred, I sought an apprenticeship as an electrician in a local coal mine.

    The realities of the coal mine environment hit me hard. It was a rough, crude, and unsophisticated world that clashed with my desire for a more sophisticated and fulfilling life. Nonetheless, I persevered and completed the four-year apprenticeship. Tragically, a few months after my time underground, an explosion claimed the lives of my mentor and the leading hand, leaving me shattered and unable to continue in the trade I had come to despise.

    Yearning for a different path, I daydreamed of suited individuals walking into workshops, consulting or selling their wares. I craved a life beyond the coal mine, envisioning something better and more fulfilling. Eventually, I found my way into the world of sales, but that is a story for another post, a tale of navigating new horizons and pursuing my aspirations.

    Life has taken me on a winding journey, exposing me to a range of experiences and shaping my perspective along the way. Each chapter has contributed to the tapestry of my existence, fueling my desires for personal growth and fulfilment. As I continue to navigate the twists and turns of life, I embrace the complexities that have made me who I am today—a multidimensional individual with a story still unfolding.

  • Discovering True Wealth: Lessons from the Joyful Souls

    Discovering True Wealth: Lessons from the Joyful Souls

    In my global travels, spanning both first-world and developing nations, I’ve had the privilege of encountering diverse cultures, witnessing varied ways of life, and observing the pursuit of happiness through different lenses. What struck me the most is the remarkable joy radiating from individuals whom the Western world would label as “poor” or living in poverty. These encounters have been eye-opening, prompting me to reevaluate the values and priorities that dominate our Western society.

    It’s a common belief that material possessions and external validation hold the keys to happiness. We’re taught that success is measured by the accumulation of wealth, status, and possessions. But the more I immersed myself in communities where the pursuit of such external markers was secondary, the more I realized that true wealth lies in a different realm altogether.

    The people I encountered in these communities possessed an indomitable spirit, a contagious joy that emanated from within. Their happiness wasn’t contingent upon material abundance or the admiration of others. Instead, they found contentment in the simple pleasures of life and cherished the essential elements that sustain human well-being: food, health, shelter, and a bed to rest upon.

    Living in a society driven by consumerism, we often find ourselves caught in a cycle of constantly seeking more. We strive to impress others who, in the grand scheme of our lives, may hold little significance. We chase after the latest gadgets, fashion trends, and luxury items, believing they will bring us happiness and validation. But the truth is, the pursuit of external validation often leaves us feeling empty and disconnected from what truly matters.

    The joyful souls I encountered taught me that genuine happiness arises when we strip away the unnecessary and focus on the foundational elements of well-being. They reminded me that our relationships, our connection to nature, and our ability to find contentment in the present moment are the true sources of fulfillment.

    As I reflect upon my experiences, I am reminded of the words of the renowned author Henry David Thoreau: “A man is rich in proportion to the number of things he can afford to let alone.” This wisdom echoes the sentiments of those I met on my travels. True wealth isn’t measured by the number of possessions we accumulate, but rather by the freedom to live a life aligned with our values, unburdened by the pressures of impressing others.

    It’s time for us in the Western world to recalibrate our understanding of wealth and success. Let us learn from the joyful souls who have discovered the secrets of contentment with so little. Let us cultivate gratitude for the foundational blessings of life and prioritize our well-being over external validation.

    In embracing this shift, we can find a profound sense of freedom, allowing us to redirect our time, energy, and resources towards nurturing meaningful relationships, pursuing our passions, and making a positive impact in the world. By letting go of the need to impress others who hold no real significance in our lives, we can find true wealth in the simplicity of a life well-lived.

    So, let us learn from the joyful souls who have shown us that if we have food, health, shelter, and a bed to rest upon, we possess the foundation of true wealth. Let us embrace the wisdom of finding contentment in the present moment and live a life guided by our values rather than external expectations. In doing so, we can rediscover the profound joy that resides within our own hearts and foster a more fulfilling and meaningful existence.

    Ultimately, true wealth lies not in the accumulation of material possessions but in the richness of our experiences, the depth of our connections, and the authenticity with which we embrace life’s simple pleasures.

    I took this photo using an Olympus OM-10 film with a 35mm lens. I didn’t get their whole home in view.
    The mother has a glass-lined box which when sealed with that cloth at the top will keep the bread warm and most.

  • Embracing My Pet Hates: A Rant-filled Journey

    Embracing My Pet Hates: A Rant-filled Journey

    Ah, pet hates. We all have them, those little things that make our blood boil and our eyes roll. Today, I want to share a glimpse into my world of frustrations, where entitled people and their infuriating habits take center stage. So buckle up, folks, because we’re about to embark on a casual rant-filled journey through some of my biggest pet peeves. And trust me, you might just find yourself nodding along in agreement or letting out a chuckle or two.

    Let’s start with entitled people. You know the ones I’m talking about – those individuals who believe the world revolves around them. Whether it’s cutting in line or expecting special treatment, their entitlement knows no bounds. But hey, who needs basic manners and consideration for others, right? It’s not like we’re all in this crazy world together.

    And what about those drivers who seem to have missed the memo on parking etiquette? I’m talking about the ones who think taking up two parking spots is a fashion statement or leaving their car diagonally across the lines is an avant-garde artistic expression. Seriously, folks, parking is not a competitive sport. Let’s all aim for the gold medal in parking like civilized human beings, shall we?

    Supermarkets can be a treasure trove of pet hates. You’ve probably encountered those folks who abandon their shopping trolleys wherever they please, turning the aisles into obstacle courses for the rest of us. It’s like a game of “Trolley Tetris” as we navigate through the mess, trying to avoid a collision with a rogue cart. Come on, folks, returning your trolley is not a secret initiation ritual – just put it back where it belongs. It’s a small act that can make a big difference in keeping the supermarket chaos-free.

    Now, let’s talk about those mysterious beings who leave random items throughout the supermarket. We’ve all come across an out-of-place can of beans in the toiletries section or a forgotten loaf of bread chilling in the cleaning aisle. It’s like a scavenger hunt, except we’re not having any fun. Perhaps these misplaced items are secret messages left by aliens trying to communicate with us mere mortals. Or maybe people just need to pay a little more attention to where they leave their groceries. Either way, it’s a constant source of confusion and amusement.

    Ah, tailgaters. The joy of driving while having another vehicle breathing down your neck. I mean, who doesn’t love the feeling of being followed so closely that you can practically see the driver’s reflection in your rearview mirror? It’s like a personal reminder that we all need a little personal space – even on the road. So, dear tailgaters, give us some breathing room, and maybe we’ll all arrive at our destinations with a little less stress.

    Now, before you accuse me of being a grumpy grouch, let me assure you that these pet hates, as annoying as they can be, also provide moments of amusement and fodder for conversation. They serve as reminders that we’re all flawed, that our quirks and irritations are what make us human.

    So, let’s raise a virtual glass to our pet hates, those pesky little things that keep us on our toes, inspire witty remarks, and ultimately remind us to approach life with a healthy dose of humor. After all, if we can’t laugh at life’s annoyances, we might just find ourselves becoming one of our own pet hates. And nobody wants that, right?

    Here’s to embracing the chaos, pet hates and all, and finding the humor in the everyday frustrations that unite us in our shared human experience. Cheers!

  • Embracing the Chaos: A Journey of Unfiltered Expression

    Embracing the Chaos: A Journey of Unfiltered Expression

    Welcome to Kiwifunknuckle, where I, Kiwifunknuckle, invite you to embark on a raw and unfiltered exploration of my thoughts, ideas, and personal experiences. This blog is my rebellious departure from the curated feeds and personas of social media, where I can break free from stringent rules and algorithms that limit our freedom of speech. Here, in this uncensored space, my unfiltered thoughts can flourish without fear of being sensored or silenced.

    Kiwifunknuckle serves as a channel for me to unveil the political landscape, voice my opinions, critique the current situation, and engage in thought-provoking discussions. It’s a safe haven for open dialogue where I can challenge the status quo, analyze policy decisions, and vent my frustrations without the fear of judgment or backlash.

    Segregation and hatred continue to plague our society, hindering progress and fostering divisions. Kiwifunknuckle encourages the exploration of these sensitive topics, allowing me to confront and challenge such attitudes head-on. Through sharing my personal experiences and advocating for unity, I strive to foster empathy and understanding, contributing to a more inclusive and compassionate world.

    Religion, with all its complexities and controversies, finds its place within the Kiwifunknuckle realm. Whether I seek solace in my faith, question religious dogmas, or desire to engage in interfaith dialogue, this platform welcomes diverse perspectives and encourages open-minded discussions.

    Life’s journey is filled with personal struggles, and I acknowledge that battling alcoholism may be part of my narrative. Kiwifunknuckle provides a supportive space where I can share my triumphs, setbacks, and strategies for recovery. Together, we can inspire one another, offer encouragement, and build a community that supports individuals on their path to healing.

    Beyond the confines of words, photography has the power to evoke emotions, tell stories, and capture the essence of life. Kiwifunknuckle embraces the art of photography, providing a canvas for my visual expression of the world around me. Through images, I can explore different perspectives, document my journey, and share moments that resonate with my soul.

    Welcome to Kiwifunknuckle, where the cacophony of thoughts finds harmony, and unfiltered expression takes flight. This blog aims to nurture a community that values authenticity, empathy, and open-mindedness. It’s a place to embrace the chaos, discuss pressing issues, delve into personal struggles, and celebrate the beauty of life through the lens of photography. Together, let us create a haven of uninhibited expression, forging connections that transcend boundaries and cultivate understanding. Join me on this transformative journey of self-discovery, growth, and unfiltered venting.